A Human’s Guide to Surviving Magical Mishaps

We sit in the car with the motor running, the air conditioner on and music playing quietly while we binge eat the various pastries that Ashton wanted to try. He practically inhales the first few, he must have been more hungry than I thought. "Did you not eat enough at breakfast?" I ask. If he needs this much to eat then I should probably do some extra grocery shopping. I usually order stuff online, but Ashton might enjoy actually going shopping in person. "I did, but using magic makes me hungry. I have been wearing a glamour all day.” He explains.

"Oh, I didn't realise. Just let me know when you get hungry. There's pretty much always somewhere to get food nearby. It won't be inconvenient." I assure him.

"Okay. This is good." He holds up the pastry he's eating.

“What did you take and put in your bag?” he asks between mouthfuls.

"It was a business card. It has contact information for the bakery. Basically Mara's phone number. I don't know we will need it, but I thought it might be useful in case we think of any questions we want to ask her later." I explain. "That was a very good idea. The woman was very helpful, although maybe a little strange... Why did she keep speaking about 'firemen'? From the context, I assume that firemen are called to assist with out of control fires. Why would she be unhappy that she did not get to call them? I would think that would be a good thing. Also why would my presence negate the need for a fireman?" Ashton sounds completely baffled, like he's been trying to reason through the conversation and is only getting more and more confused. I can;t help myself, I burst out laughing. I laugh so hard I start to cry while Ashton looks on with an awkward half smile.

"Sorry." I choke out.

"I never thought that this is a conversation I would be having with a fae. I was just thinking that this might be fun to report back to the mayor. Okay, so basically you're right. Firefighters are who we call when there is an out of control fire. They have specialised vehicles and training to put the fire out and to try to save anyone who is trapped in it. It's considered a particularly heroic and dangerous career choice. Because of that, there is also this charity fundraiser thing that they do because there is a stereotype that firefighters are attractive. So basically they get super attractive firefighters and take pictures of them looking particularly alluring. Then they put them in calendars and sell them to make money. Anyway, the combination of the respect and heroism from their career and the stereotype of them being attractive was what the woman was referring to. She was joking that she would have liked a chance to see some hot, I mean attractive firemen. Oh, and firefighters can be women too, but I think the stereotype mostly applies to men. I don't know." I think I totally botched that explanation. I have no idea if it made any sense. Trying to explain jokes based on information that 'everyone just knows' is harder than I thought. Ashton is quiet and thoughtful for a moment.

"You are telling me that firemen are considered especially appealing as romantic partners and this is what the woman was referring to?" he tries to sum up.

"Uh, yeah. Basically. She wasn't being completely serious. Obviously she didn't want the fire to get out of control. It was mostly a joke. As for her saying I might not need them because you're here, she was complementing you and saying that you're attractive so I wouldn't need to go hit on a firefighter.” I explain. Ashton jerks back in shock.

"Hit on? Why would you do that?" He sounds alarmed.

"Hit on is another way to say flirt. She was saying I don't need to call the firemen and flirt with them because you're attractive and she was assuming that you and I are together. I didn't think it was worth dragging the conversation out longer by correcting her." I tell him apologetically. It's kind of rude of me to let people assume we're together. Actually, why does everyone keep assuming we're a couple? I understood why the cops all thought that since we were holding hands and stuff, but we were just walking together in the bakery. Maybe it's just that people like seeing romance where there is none. I don't think I'm particularly doing anything to give off that vibe, and I doubt Ashton is.novelbin

I suppose I should appreciate the compliment, although somehow it felt more like the compliment was intended more for you than for me." He remarks and I laugh.

"You know, maybe it was." I agree.

The scene of the next small fire isn't far away, only a five minute drive. This one looks like it was just someone's garden and it looks like a private residence. We do knock on the front door but no one is home. "Can you tell if this was magic?" I ask as Ashton pokes around the yard.

"I believe it was, there is only the smallest spark of magic. The plants in this garden must have been quite dry and flammable for them to have burned even this much. It is like the fire caught but was then immediately put out. I do not know why anyone would do this. What was it supposed to accomplish?" He puzzles it out and I consider it.

"What if it was an accident? If the fae was startled by something in an unfamiliar environment, maybe he or she panicked and set the fire, then put it out to avoid drawing attention." I suggest. Ashton's eyes light up.

"I think you must be right. Many fae will lose control or use magic impulsively when startled. You must have seen in your horrid elevator that I lost control of my glamour for a moment. This was likely a similar situation." He explains. I just nod. actually didn't see him lose his glamour because I was looking through it already. Maybe he was more scared of the elevator than I thought. I know it freaked him out, but I didn't realise that he lost control like that. "So there was definitely a fae here then?" I confirm.

"Yes." He agrees.

"Okay so should we try to drive to the next fire from here? We can go slowly and keep an eye out for other signs." I suggest.

"Very well. But please remember that if we see the fae you should stay far away. This fire suggests that the fae is frightened and out of control. That is especially dangerous. Even if the assassin does not intend to hurt you, we cannot trust that will not happen accidentally." He warns.

“I'll stay clear. Promise." I assure him for what feels like the tenth time. It's sweet that he is concerned, but I don't need the constant reminders. I'm here to keep an eye on him, I don't need a babysitter.

We jump back in the car and we drive super slowly towards the next fire scene. I feel like we're basically following a really creepy trail. The question is, what will we do when we run out of fires to follow? I don't think there have been any new ones in the last twenty four hours or so. What will we find at the end of this trail? A freaked out and out of control fae assassin? Or even worse, nothing at all.