BDSM Checklist: A, B, C

Chapter 34

It was an order she’d heard plenty of times before, from James and others. She slid onto his lap, straddling his thighs with her legs on the seat. James spread his own legs a bit, forcing hers open further. Mae pressed her nails into her palms.

James flicked the bells dangling from her pussy lips. “You don’t seem happy to see me, Mae.”

“My apologies, Sir.” She tried and failed to smile, to pretend everything was all right when inside she was so very angry and upset.

“You’re also being uncommonly obedient.”

The casual comment, said with a smile, cut deep. Mae took a shuddering breath. “Was I… Am I a bad submissive?”

James stroked her arms with his palms. “No, Mae. You’re a lovely sub to play with.”

Her throat was too tight for words, so Mae only nodded in acknowledgement.

James carefully took the clamps off her pussy lips, massaging them gently. Mae’s sex clenched when he brushed her clit, but it was a purely physical reaction.

“What’s wrong, Mae? I thought you’d be happy to be here with me.”

This time she forced a smile and tossed her hair, struggling to put aside what she was feeling and present herself the way she normally did. “Of course I am, Sir.”

Master James raised one brow, clearly not believing her.

She toyed with the top button of Master James’s shirt. “Did you miss me?”

Master James frowned.

Desperation curled in Mae’s belly. She’d disappointed Master Xavier and now it looked like she was disappointing Master James.

“I want to be a good sub.” That much was true. She ran her hands down Master James’s chest, then brushed her palm against his crotch. “May I, Sir, please?” If she could pleasure him in this most basic way, he might not notice the pain she was sure was hiding in her eyes.

“Don’t you want me to play with you first?” Master James ran two fingers over the lips of her sex. “I heard that your scene with Master Xavier was pure BDSM. No sex, no pleasure.”

“Did Master Xavier tell you that?” Mae tried to keep her tone light, to pretend she didn’t care what Xavier had said about her, or thought about her.

But Master James didn’t answer her question. “I saw the marks. Did you like your beating?”

She didn’t have to answer. Her body did it for her, a small moan escaping her before she clamped her lips closed.

“Do you wish he’d fucked you?”

Mae closed her eyes.

“Answer me.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“If you agreed to add sex as part of your session, you’d be completely at his mercy. There would be no restrictions on how he could touch you.”

The idea of being at the mercy of Master Xavier sent arousal shooting through her. James’s fingers dipped into the entrance of her pussy, finding the fresh wetness there.

“You’re wetter now, Mae. Is that because I talked about Master Xavier?”

A tear slid down her cheek. “Please, Sir. Let me suck your cock. I don’t want to talk about Master Xavier.”

“Because you’re scared of him?”

“No, because…because I’m not scared. I should be and I’m not and I hate it that he didn’t want me.” Mae couldn’t hold in her feelings anymore. She covered her face with her hands.

James pulled her against his chest, rubbing her back until she calmed a bit. “You’ve been lying to all of us, haven’t you?”

“What?” Mae sat back, shocked at his words. She shook her head. “I haven’t lied.”

“You have, but you lied to yourself more than anyone. Mae, you need more than this.” Master James gestured around the pretty room.

“No, I love this.” She did. This is who she was.

“You’ve grown as a submissive.” He lowered his voice. “I know who you are outside of these walls, and you can still be that person. Wanting something darker and harder doesn’t have to change that.”

Mae bowed her head. “I’m not what Master Xavier wants. I can’t be what he wants.”

“You shouldn’t want to be anything but true to yourself. I think you’ve been hiding for far too long. Maybe it’s time to move on from being the naughty girl or sassy princess.” Those were only a few of the pet names she’d been called over the years.

“It’s who I am.”

“It’s who you were.”

“Please, Master James. I can’t talk about this.” Mae jumped off his lap, suddenly frantic to get rid of the collar and cuffs. To free herself of any reminder of Xavier and return to the kind of BDSM that she was comfortable with. Master James stood and reached for her but she stumbled back. She ripped the clamps from her nipples and threw them aside, then jerked at the buckle of the collar.

“Mae, enough.” The deep voice cut through the buzzing in her ears. Like a tolled bell it focused her thoughts and calmed her mind. Mae looked slowly to Master James, who indicated with a jerk of his head that she should turn around.

Master Xavier stepped out from behind the dressing screen. He was again wearing all black clothing and the severe mask. He was a menacing, raw presence, out of place in the elegant room, but no less powerful or in command here than he had been in the Iron Court.

She looked from James to Xavier, the pieces clicking together. Published by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

“You—” Her voice broke. Mae took a breath that was meant to be calming, but instead all it did was fuel the fire of her rage. “You son of a bitch.”

Mae leaped at Xavier, wanting him to feel some of the pain he’d caused her. She had the satisfaction of seeing his eyes widen before James caught ahold of her, pulling her back toward the bed.

“You complete ass.” Mae struggled against Master James. “Let me go.”

“No, Mae. I won’t. Calm down and think.”

“I am thinking.” Her hair whipped over her face, obscuring her vision. “He tricked me. You tricked me.” Mae tossed her head to the side, managing to knock Master James’s chin. With an oomph he let go of her.

Mae brushed her hair out of her eyes with her hands, ready to let Master Xavier have it.

But he was already there. Mae squeaked in surprise to see him looming over her, but before she could do or say anything he grabbed her arms, forcing her back three steps and then raising her hands above her head, clicking the D-rings on her cuffs onto a chain that dangled from the bedpost. In a matter of seconds he took command of her body, his control precise and absolute.

He pushed her back against the post and he curled one hand around her neck, digging his fingers into the pressure points at the back of her jawbone. “Enough.”