An Explosion of Feelings
“Nothing, really. It’s just that I feel like his face is familiar to me.”
“Familiar?”
“That’s why I asked if you’ve known him for a while. It seems he was once engaged to my cousin of nephew’s sister-in-law’s friend.”
“Engagement?”
“That was in the past. Don’t worry about it. Besides, I just wanted to check. Is he really the Max I know? Besides, I don’t think he knows me. I mean, I only vaguely remember now because we only met at his engagement party before.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. That was a long time ago. I think it was over five years ago. They were only engaged for three or four months.”
“They didn’t get married?”
“Oh my, Von. If they got married, there’s no way he’d be here with you. That would mean their relationship had failed.”
~
At that moment, Vonda was suddenly reminded of her conversation at a high school friend’s wedding party. A conversation with Samuel where he briefly mentioned Max’s failed engagement. At the time, Vonda had thought that Samuel might be mistaken, or that even if it was true, it was just a thing of the past.
But wait. Why should she convince herself that it was just in the past? To calm the strange turmoil that had suddenly arisen in her chest?
“Max and I… were engaged once.”
Giselle’s voice shattered Vonda’s suddenly chaotic thoughts. She blinked twice and looked at Giselle’s beautiful face. Honestly, Vonda did not know how to react to this information.
Earlier she had said that she was Max’s ex-fiancee, right? So that meant by default that she and Max had been engaged. What did she mean by that? I’m not that clueless.
Still, Vonda tried to keep her composure. Instead of expressing her thoughts, she smiled broadly.
“Oh, yes. I know.”
Ironically, that was all Vonda could say. However, her brief words brought a frown to Giselle’s face.
“You know?”
Vonda nodded once.
“Did Max tell you?”
Vonda’s eyes blinked again. “Uh, well…”
“Did he tell you why we broke up?”
A question that made Vonda uncomfortable. It was clear from her expression that Vonda did not like the questions Giselle was asking her.
“That… is your business,” Vonda replied later. “I have no connection to your past.”
There was a moment of silence. For a while there was no sound between Vonda and Giselle. There was only the buzz of the confused guests around them, wondering why the evening’s event had not started yet.
“Have you been with him long?” Giselle asked.
Vonda took a deep breath. Frankly, she was surprised by the girl’s next question. No wonder what Vonda said was not an answer but another question.
“Since you’ve been asking me questions all this time, what do you mean? Are you interrogating me or something?”
Giselle looked as if she swallowed hard and clenched her hands. “I’m just… asking.”
“Oh! In that case, you seem to be the kind of girl who doesn’t know how to find topics of conversation on a first meet,” Vonda remarked. “Does that make sense? We just met and you’re asking me weird questions? Why not ask where the toilet is or something?”
“Sorry. I-”
“Enough with the apologies,” Vonda cut in quickly. For some reason, her breath was suddenly heated. “I’m leaving.”
Vonda decided to leave, feeling useless to continue being alone with Giselle. Especially since those questions made her uncomfortable.
However, Giselle reached out her hand as Vonda was about to turn around, grabbed Vonda’s hand and stopped her in her tracks.
Vonda was taken aback. She looked down at her hand, and then her face slowly regained its composure as she looked at Giselle.
“I need to ask you something,” Giselle began.
Vonda tried to be patient, although patience was clearly not one of Vonda’s qualities.
“You still want to ask?” Vonda inquired.
Giselle seemed to bite her lower lip.
“You want to ask about my relationship with Max?” Vonda asked again. “Is that it?”
Giselle’s face looked shocked, but she did not deny it. Instead, she nodded.
Wow! Extraordinary honesty.
Trying to remain calm, Vonda realized that Giselle’s earlier honesty had had a tremendous effect on her. Now Vonda could feel her chest heating up. Even the air coming out of her nostrils felt hot. It was as if she had suddenly turned into a dragon and could breathe fire out of her nose. It was a strange sensation that really drained her energy.
So, Vonda slowly tried to release Giselle’s hand that was still holding her wrist. She tried to smile, even though her face looked incredibly stiff at the moment.
“In that case, you can ask Max directly about our relationship. I don’t want to reveal anything about our relationship to someone I don’t know.”
But Giselle did not let go of Vonda’s hand. She persisted until Vonda’s brow furrowed in discomfort.
“Is your relationship serious?”
Darn!
“W-what?”
This time, Vonda paid no attention to her hands, focusing instead on Giselle’s question. When Vonda’s eyes met hers, she could see how serious Giselle was. Giselle was really waiting for Vonda’s answer, and that was difficult for Vonda.
“That… um…”
“I know that Max and I broke up five years ago. I know it was my fault. I left him, but Max needs to know. I still love him to this day.”
Perhaps it was at that moment that Vonda experienced the truth of the saying, “The heart seemed to stop beating. For a moment after Giselle uttered that sentence, Vonda felt as if her heart had indeed stopped beating.
A cold sensation enveloped her, trapping Vonda and making her instantly weak. For a few moments, Vonda could only remain silent, as if to give Giselle time to continue.
“I really do still love him and I want to apologize to him. Max needs to know that I never forgot him all this time,” Giselle said as she took a deep breath. “I still love him.”
Vonda was stunned. She remained silent, not knowing what to say in response to Giselle’s confession. All she knew was that this reality made her feel lifeless.
At that moment, memories of the past flashed through Vonda’s mind. Specifically, the incident in the parking lot involving her, Max, and Andrew. Max had scolded her mercilessly in the car, expressing his disapproval of a girl who chose a bad guy. Worse, Max had said one word. “Hate.”
Finally, Vonda understood. Finding Giselle in front of her made her understand Max’s attitude. It was completely understandable. Max had been hurt by Giselle.
“I-if you really love him…”
Vonda’s voice was soft, almost a whisper, but still clearly audible to Giselle.
“If you really love him, then why did you leave him?”
Giselle blinked. “What?”
Vonda swallowed hard and jerked her hand out of Giselle’s grip.
At first, Giselle thought Vonda would leave, but she was wrong. On the contrary, Vonda confronted her with a flushed face.
“If you really love him, why did you leave him? Why did you marry someone else?”
There was anger in the question and it startled Giselle. She quickly glanced left and right, at some of the other guests who seemed to have noticed the change in the atmosphere between them.
“Vonda.”
A minute ago, Vonda had felt as if her body had gone numb. But now she felt something different, something more disturbing, as Giselle’s words echoed in her mind.
She said she loved Max?
There was a sudden surge of anger and Vonda felt her vision darken. She seemed to feel thousands of emotions, ready to explode at any moment.
“Is that what love is, leaving him to marry someone else?” Vonda shouted again. “I may not be very smart, Giselle, but I do know one thing. If we love someone, that means we don’t leave them!”
Giselle’s feet moved back again. That was when Vonda, consciously or not, moved forward.
Both of Vonda’s eyes locked on Giselle. The fiery gleam in her eyes made Giselle shrink instantly. Vonda was truly angry.
“If you really loved him, you should have married him. Not someone else!”
Repeatedly insulting someone in front of the public was certainly shocking to Giselle. Her face turned red, just like Vonda’s. The difference was that if Giselle’s face was red from embarrassment, Vonda’s was red from anger.
“Why are you getting so mad at me?” Giselle asked later. “Do you realize what you’re doing? This is in public! Are you trying to embarrass me?”
“Me?” Vonda blinked. “Angry?”
That one word seemed to stick in Vonda’s throat.
Am I angry? Why am I angry?
Vonda blinked once, feeling the heat in her eyes.
“Yes, I am! I am angry! I know exactly what I’m doing. Meanwhile, you who think about embarrassment, have you ever thought about how Max felt back then?”
Whispers immediately spread around them. As if on command, the guests moved closer to form a circle with Vonda and Giselle in the center. Perhaps they saw it as free entertainment while they waited for the event to begin.
For Vonda, she did not care about anything else at that moment. In her eyes, there was only herself and Giselle.
“I’m angry, Giselle! How could you waste someone like Max!” Vonda shouted again. She bit her lower lip hard, trying to hold back her frustration. “You’re a brainless girl! Max is the best, the most amazing guy…”
Vonda’s fists clenched at her sides. No matter how thunderous her voice was, that was Vonda. She was a girl who always spoke her mind, regardless of where she was. She did not seem to care that many people were interested in the commotion she was causing. She did not care that there were people in different corners trying to get to her as fast as possible.
Vonda did not care. She only cared about one thing: expressing herself, even if her voice eventually lost its strength.
“… the most incredible person I’ve ever met.”
Giselle was silent for a moment. “I…”
Vonda wiped her face, lifted her head and took a deep breath. She forced a painful smile.
“I’ve only known him a few months, but it’s enough to know what kind of person he is. The way he treats his parents. His love for his mother. His kindness to the people around him. His maturity. His spoiled nature.”
There was a truly suffocating feeling in Vonda’s chest as she said all this. An uneasiness that managed to bring a tear to the corner of her eye.
“For a guy like that, you traded him for someone else who made you suffer?” Vonda asked. “Don’t you know there are hundreds of girls out there hoping to find a guy like Max?”This is from NôvelDrama.Org.
Yelled at, cornered and humiliated, Giselle tried not to react at first. She was still trying to keep her composure in front of so many guests. But it seemed that Vonda’s words managed to ignite Giselle’s emotions.
“I know I wasted Max before. I was stupid back then, but I still really love him.”
“Even the dumbest person wouldn’t let go of someone they love!” Vonda shouted. “You… you… Max loved you once. You shouldn’t have wasted his feelings.”
Vonda blinked. Something ran down her cheeks.
“You were lucky to be loved by Max, but you wasted it all.”
She tried again to regain control, but failed. Vonda could not hold back her tears and her voice trembled with a painful tone.
“If it were me… no matter how stupid I might be… I would never waste Max for another man or for… anyone else.”
As this sentence fell from Vonda’s lips, there was a sudden silence. Especially as Vonda lowered her head.
Vonda tried to wipe away her tears with shaking hands. It happened just as a voice came from the crowd.
“Vonda.”
It was a deep voice calling Vonda’s name. It came from the crowd of onlookers who were still watching the situation. Ironically, some of them were videotaping the situation.
Vonda lifted her head to look at the source of the voice, and so did Giselle. Both girls were equally shocked when they saw who it was. Of course, it was Max, the guy who had become the subject of the two girls’ excitement.
Max stepped forward, followed by Olivia. He looked straight into Vonda’s eyes without blinking.
“Vonda, you…”
But Vonda was too confused. Various overwhelming emotions tightened in her chest so that she spoke immediately.
“Forgive me, Max,” Vonda whispered, beating her chest once. “I know I have no right to speak like this, but… it really is suffocating me.” She pointed at Giselle. “… to see her left you for another man.”
Max’s jaw seemed to move up and down rapidly. He raised his hands and held both of Vonda’s upper arms to steady her.
“Vonda. Vonda.”
But Vonda seemed to be losing consciousness. She was so dazed that she didn’t pay attention to Max’s attempts to calm her.
“I’m sorry too, Max. I can’t go on with all this.” Vonda shook her head. “I can’t keep pretending when I… I…” Vonda looked tired as she finished her sentence. “Everything between us feels so real, Max.”
Max’s hands caressed Vonda’s arms. “Vonda-”
“Excuse me. What’s going on?”
A voice interrupted Vonda’s words, drawing the crowd’s attention to a group of well-dressed individuals emerging from the other side. Several people in formal attire appeared.
Vonda did not know who they were. However, there were two middle-aged faces that she certainly recognized. So, Vonda let go of Max’s grip.
“Dad. Mom. I’m sorry.”
Max reached for Vonda again. “Vonda, listen. Vonda.”
But Vonda ignored him. What happened next was that Vonda spoke again.
“I can’t go on with all this, Max. I hope you’ll be happy.”
Max’s eyes widened. “You…”
Max’s words hung in the air as in the next second Vonda pulled away again. This time she ran away from Max and the commotion, not giving Max a chance to speak.
The incident happened too quickly and had deadly consequences. At least a middle-aged woman was in shock.
“Vonda!”
When Riley suddenly screamed hysterically, Max knew he had to go after Vonda. He had to explain the situation right then and there. He did not want Vonda to draw her own conclusions. But Giselle, who had been silent the whole time, suddenly sprang into action. She grabbed Max’s hand.
“Max.”
*
Vonda did not care about her appearance as she left the hotel. Disheveled, with tears streaming down, and an aching heart. She hastened her steps. When she managed to flag down a taxi, she immediately called Sarah.
“Sarah.”
On the other end, Sarah froze upon hearing Vonda’s voice, which sounded different than usual. She approached cautiously and asked, “What’s wrong, Von?”
Vonda paused for a moment, trying to hold back her sobs. But it was futile. Her shoulders shook even more with the pressure of the pain. Her chest was getting increasingly painful, and she could not hold on much longer.
“I love him, Sar. I really love him.”
Sarah was the first person who was not surprised at all by Vonda’s confession. That’s why Sarah just sighed deeply.
“Come back and cry your heart out. Tomorrow, I’ll come to your place. Okay?”
Vonda did not respond. She nodded through her tears, letting the pain squeeze her heart even tighter.
Oh God. I love Max.
*