A Human’s Guide to Surviving Magical Mishaps

"UGH. I'm sorry that keeping me around is such an inconvenience to you!" I half yell at him. See, this is why I wanted to have this conversation far away from our friends. I can only imagine how embarrassing it would be if they heard that. But seriously, how difficult is it for him to just give me a clear answer one way or the other. Does he love me or doesn't he? Ashton stares at me in shock.

"Inconvenience? When did I ever say that you are in inconvenience? Is it because I pointed out that our connection means I need to keep you close? That was clearly just an excuse to keep you close to me." He says calmly. Somehow his calm tone is just making me angrier. How is it that he's so relaxed while I'm freaking out? Can't he look at least a little uncomfortable? His lack of emotional response is making me feel stupid and irrational. I take a deep breath and force myself to speak in a more moderated tone.

"I already know that we need to stay near each other Ashton. That's not what I was asking. I still have no idea how you feel about us BEING together." I pause and quietly add.

"If you don't love me you can just say so, you don't need to keep avoiding the question." I drop my gaze to the floor and kick at the dirt. I know I should look up at him, but I don't want to see the look on his face. If there is pity or sympathy there I'll burst into tears again, I just know it.

Ashton is quiet for a minute before he starts swearing loudly in fae. He spits out words so quickly that I miss the meaning of most of them but he doesn't sound happy. I cringe back away from him. Is he really so upset by the question? I think it's a fairly reasonable thing to ask. I never expected his anger. By the time he calms himself down I'm practically shaking. I glance up at him nervously. He looks over at me and when he sees my expression he swears again under his breath. I don't think I've ever seen him look so frustrated before. He steps close to me and I'm surprised when he hooks his hand behind my neck and loops his fingers through my hair. He uses the hold to angle my head to look at him properly. His other hand lands on my hip where he holds on tightly, effectively pinning me in place. I guess there's no running from this conversation now, not that I was planning to.

"Do you truly not understand?" He says, his voice so soft that I can barely hear him.

"Understand what?" I ask. Ashton sighs and looks straight into my eyes.

"That I am in love with you of course." He says firmly. My knees go weak with relief and his grip on my hip slides to my waist to support me rather than hold me in place. His hold on my hair becomes soothing rather than guiding as I stare up at him.

"I do not understand. How can someone as observant as you miss something that is so obvious? Everyone else knows how I feel. I did not particularly try to hide it." He really does sound baffled. His brow is furrowed and I feel like he's trying to read my mind, to see into my thoughts.

"Why would you even think that I might not love you Kat? If there is something that I am doing wrong I would like to remedy it." He says sincerely. I give him a weak smile.

"It's just... You didn't seem to want me as much until we had this connection. You seemed interested maybe, but not like you were willing to commit to me. It wasn't until we were already stuck together that you seemed willing to consider anything more long term." I explain. Ashton chokes out a laugh of disbelief.

"You thought that I was only a little bit interested? Kat, I have wanted you since almost the first moment we met. I suppose it was my mistake. I told you that fae have different attitudes towards relationships and touch. I should have explained more. It is just difficult to explain something that seems normal to me. There are intricacies I did not think needed to be explained." Ashton lets me go and runs a hand through his hair. He takes a deep breath and his eyes drop to my hands. He takes my right hand, lifts it to his lips and kisses it.

"A kiss to your hand is a formal declaration of interest. Something I gave not long after we met." He says pointedly. I shrug.

"You didn't TELL me that's what it was." I object. He sighs and continues.

"I flirted with you constantly." He tries again. I shake my head.

"And Marcus flirted with you. Flirting doesn't mean anything. Lots of people flirt and you're so polite that it was sometimes hard to tell if you were just being nice." I argue. Ashton groans and drops his hands onto my shoulders, then lets them stroke down my arms to land on my waist where he lets them rest.

"I took every chance I could to touch you. I... I KISSED you! How could you not understand?" He sounds incredulous at this point. I frown at him.

"You can be attracted to someone and enjoy their touch without being in love with them. There are plenty of people who kiss people that they barely know. Like in the club I took you to. How am I supposed to be sure of your feelings based on that?" I object. Ashton looks confused again.

"Do humans kiss people they are not committed to?" He seems kind of appalled. I shrug.

"Sometimes. It's not uncommon." I answer. Ashton scrunches up his face in disgust.

"Fae do not do that. We do not kiss someone unless we are committed to the relationship. It is why my mother was so concerned when she met you. Our level of physical affection told her that the relationship is serious. She was likely expecting us to announce an engagement at any moment." He explains.

This time I'm the one gasping in shock. I also flush bright red. An engagement? That's what she was expecting? No wonder she was so concerned about making sure I was a good person. No wonder she was so friendly once she decided that she liked me. She gave me a bracelet that was a gift from her recently departed husband. I should have known there was more involved in that gift than just gratitude. Now I feel kind of stupid. I wish I had known this MUCH earlier. Hell by this logic, Ashton had made his feelings about me clear long before I confessed how I feel about him. Except he didn't TELL me that's what it all meant, so how was I supposed to know? Then again, he doesn't have a good understanding of human courtship either, so he probably didn't know that I didn't know.

"I... I didn't realise..." I trail off. Ashton sighs again.

"Kat, I love how observant and considerate you are. How bright and easy to speak to you are. I love you for your patience and for how accepting you are. Darling, I nearly killed myself trying to save you. The entire connection between us was created because I gave up a piece of my own soul to keep you alive! How could you think for even a second that I do not love you? I am almost offended that you thought I might not." He frowns, annoyance on his face, but it quickly fades away when I place a hand on his cheek.

"I thought that MAYBE you cared, but I couldn't be sure. I told you that I loved you but you never said it back." I point out. Ashton's "What?" He answers blankly.novelbin

"Until just now you never said that you love me, even though I've said it several times." I clarify. Ashton swears again.

eyes go wide.

"Kat, I am so sorry that I was not more clear. I truly did not realise that I had not said it back to you. I did not know that you had any doubts about how I feel. Although now that I think about it you clearly gave me many chances to make it clear and I did not take any of them because I did not realise I needed to. So let me make myself very clear. I love you. Completely. You have my whole heart as well as part of my soul and when I say I want to keep you near me it is not because I have no choice or to make things more simple but because I cannot imagine spending my life without you. Now that I have explained myself properly, I am going to ask you again. What do you want to do Kat? Will you come live with me in the fae realm? Not just because you need to stay close but because I love you and I never want you to leave me."